I break your computer, then charge you to fix it.
At Honest Trav's IT, I offer premium under-qualified tech support to businesses too tired to Google it themselves. No jargon. No promises. Just Trav.
Services & Damages
All prices are estimates. Final invoice depends on how many biscuits you have in the tin.
Turning It Off & On Again
The industry-standard fix. I press the power button twice. If it doesn't work, I press it a third time and charge you for it.
Cable Management
I will look at the tangled mess behind your desk, sigh loudly, unplug two things at random, and leave.
Cyber Security Audit
I check if your password is 'password'. It usually is. I write 'yes' on a Post-it and mail it to you.
Cloud Migration
I throw your hard drive out the window on a cloudy day. Truly airborne. Truly gone.
Data Recovery
See 'Cloud Migration'. Recovery not included, implied, or reasonably possible.
Printer Support
I stand next to your printer and whisper threats. It works about 12% of the time. Above industry average.
What My Victims Say
2 out of 5 stars"Trav rebuilt our network in under 40 hours. It's been down ever since. He assures us this is normal."
3 out of 5 stars"I called for a broken mouse. Trav arrived, drank all our coffee, and left a bill for $600. Very honest about it though."
1 out of 5 stars"He said 'have you tried turning it off and on again' and then billed me for consultation. 10/10 committed to the bit."
The Trav Method™
You call in a panic
Ideally at 4:57pm on a Friday.
I arrive vibed
Approximately 3 days later. No apology.
I make it worse
Deeply, meaningfully worse.
I invoice you
Rounded up to the nearest holiday.
FAQ
Are you actually qualified?
Define 'qualified'. I own a USB stick and a lanyard. In this economy, that's basically a degree.
Do you offer refunds?
No. But I will say 'sorry mate' with a lot of feeling, which is technically a form of compensation.
Why is your rate so high?
Honesty is expensive. Any IT guy will break your system. Only I'll tell you it was on purpose.
Do you have insurance?
I have a strong belief that nothing bad will happen. So far, statistically incorrect.
Book Trav Today.
Regret It Tomorrow.
No online booking system, because I broke it. Call the hotline or slide a note under the door of a random office building. I'll find it eventually.